Week 11: Parenting and Discipline

I decided just to post a few of my favorite most influential notes from this week! Enjoy!

Three Situations in which parents need to be involved in the discipline process

1Too Dangerous to let the consequences do the teaching
2Consequences are too far in the future to understand and learn from
3The consequence affects others

Start off with polite request/ teaching respect

Then, an I message

WHEN YOU... leave your socks on the floor
I FEEL... like your taking advantage of me
BECAUSE... I either have to pick them up or have a dirty house because of you
I WOULD LIKE... for you to try to remember to pick them up for me

I think its important to remember that even if you use these steps, you may not be teaching them respect if the last part is approached incorrectly. For example, if you say ( in the above situation) I WOULD LIKE you to never do that again or id like you to stop being selfish and think of me and my feeling first. This could just cause the person to cut themselves off and not learning anything, as well as being more disrespectful.
LOVE AND LOGIC, now my mom and my aunt are doing this and its really interesting. I believe that it has some really great ideas. HOWEVER i think at times it can become very manipulative. I think its important to involve the kids in their consequences. They will learn what logical consequences are and they will be more accepting of it when they deserve those consequences, good or bad.

Discipline is teaching! Punishment is not teaching, its and inaccurate way to teach realistic consequences.

The way that children view their parents is very similar to the way that they see God.


Segment #3 where often is heard a discouraging word

"i dont see why id waste money on guitar lessons if you wont practice anyways"
Assuming that they would get in trouble

Instead use positive re-enforcement and show trust in your child so you can expect trust from their part
"what are your plans" "you have good judgement" " You know the rules"